I try to maintain some sort of friendship with everyone I've dated, but lately, they've all been falling by the wayside. Maybe I'm doing something wrong? Maybe I'm just tired of how much they changed?
Maybe I finally took off the Shallow Hal glasses to see what they were really about?
Case no. 1:
We were friends nearly 10 years, and decided to try the whole dating thing in 2006. She broke up with me on New Year's Day 2007. We didn't speak for eight months. The last year was a bit topsy-turvy.
She called me up one day and the conversation was a bit disturbing: "I just feel like you put yourself in the middle of something that had nothing to do with you. That's why I'm mad."
What?
I noticed a difference of opinion between her and another of our friends, and I was doing my job as a friend to point it out. Neither was able to detect that the other wasn't on the same page. Needless to say, I soon pulled back from the situation when I saw no resolution would be found.
She felt I'd crossed the line. And wanted an apology.
Why?
"If someone came to me and said I'd hurt them, I'd swallow my pride and apologize, even if I felt I had done nothing wrong."
I'm glad you would. But that's not me.
We haven't talked in a few weeks. And I'm honestly not sad about it. Sure, she's been a great friend to me, but sometimes I feel like if I'm not on board with her logic, obviously there's something wrong with me.
And there's not.
2 years ago
1 comment:
I can see her point of view. At the same time, that is contingent on whether you and her felt like there was an apology needed! I mean I do alot of things and they hurt peoples feelings, but I don't apologize for all of them! Some are meant to be hurtful to get you to a point of realization!
As long as you are comfortable not apologizing and you can sleep at night, I say you did the right thing! Search deep within to be sure!
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